corporatetrash.com : destroying corporate double talk, daily.
vomit list & search [search on one or more fields] Submit Your Own
 

Now serving 310 total puddles of vomit and growing. Viewing at a time.
1-a   a-b   b-b   b-c   c-d   d-e   e-f   f-h   h-i   i-l   l-m   m-o   o-p   p-p   p-r   r-r   s-s   s-s   s-t   t-v   v-y   view all

10,000 foot level
An alternative to "high-level". Alternatively, the level you'd like the person saying this to jump from.
 
A
Shortening of AM as in morning, because removing the "M" is really saving a TON of time. "Max, we have to set up a powwow to see if we can onboard some of these dissenters. How's 7A or 5 P looking?"
 
A/B
Verb or Noun. To compare two things. "Let's do an A/B on these products". Borish substitue for the words "compare" and "comparison".
 
action item
Something which needs to be either done or at least placed in a list of things in need of doing. For example, an action item in the de-hiring of a resource would be the revocation of the resource's network privileges.
 
action sound motion emotion
This gem was uttered in response to the mere mention of Macromedia Flash. To capture the spirit of this filth, say it with pauses between each word and throw in two "finger guns". If you are unable to pull it off, be very happy -- because only the lowest form of septic-swilling corporate trash can manage it. This apparently captures the spirit of animation on a web site, but is about as inspiring as a marketing prick using "sexy" to describe something. Thanks, now I need a shower.
 
action-oriented
Similar to "task-oriented." Your basic corporate bullshit. Basically means to be progressive or pro-active. Really lame.
 
add value
Increase the worth of something. There is no term for "decrease the worth of something."
 
aggregate
Whole, total, gross amount. Not offensive on its own, but so over used as to be nauseating.
 
aha
No, not the 80's band A-Ha. Aha is typically uttered as an exclamation upon thinking of a good idea - as in, "Eureka!" Somehow this got perverted and the utmost of corporate trash use it this way, "That's a great aha." Or, "Give us your ahas."
 
ahead of the curve
Being proactive or being ahead of schedule or somehow ingeniusly having predicted whatever has come up and seeing that you don't have to deal with the problem because you had such amazing foresight. Announcement of "being ahead of the curve" is usually followed by delays, scope creep and a whole host of bullshit problems.
 
All hands on deck
A seafaring term now used by corporate slugs whenever maximum resources are needed to finish a project. An "all hands on deck" meeting means EVERYONE must attend.
 
anyhoo
This one is self-explanatory. Seriously, "anyhow" is a tried and true word with the same number of letters. Why change the 'w' to a 'o' to purposely sound like a pansy?
 
AR
Action Required
 
ask (used as a noun)
A ridiculous misuse of a word, "ask" has recently emerged as a synonym for "question." Examples of such disgusting misuse would be raising ones hand in a meeting and saying "I have an ask," or discussing a potential question someone might have regarding a new project by saying "now, the ask in this is going to be......"
 
at the end of the day
This one of the most over used phrases in the corporate management world and frankly I'm appalled I didn't post this sooner. "At the end of the day, we need to provide the client what we promised in our initial proposal and I don't care how we do it." This term obviously doesn't literally refer to the end of the day - of course almost none of corporate speak translates literally, that would be too easy.
 

1-a   a-b   b-b   b-c   c-d   d-e   e-f   f-h   h-i   i-l   l-m   m-o   o-p   p-p   p-r   r-r   s-s   s-s   s-t   t-v   v-y   view all
 
Submit Your Own
 
copyright © 2004-2017 disgruntled productions